Don't Go In The Bathroom!
(copyright Red 2003)

- You could find some strange, alienesque marks on your back.

- You could be approached by a shadowy government figure with
unclear intentions.

- A 20th Century Mutant might try to rip your liver out.

- You might be murdered in the bathtub.

- You might see strange things as a result of someone being
  murdered in the bathtub.

- You might be electrocuted by an intelligent computer system.

- You could find some strange, alienesque marks under your arms.

- A 20th Century Mutant might try to climb out of the toilet.

- You might not hear the telephone ring, leading to an undead
  sociopath accessing your answerphone messages.

- You may find yourself vomiting flukeworms.

- You may find yourself killed by a half-man, half-flukeworm creature.

- You could be seduced by an evil vampire named Kristen.

- A death fetishist may try to run you a bath.

- Alex Krycek might be waiting to kill you.

- If you're responsible for inhumane experiments, you may have
  your throat cut.

- You might be attacked by a fat-sucking vampire.

- You could be killed by cockroaches...

- Or you could suffer a brain aneurism.

- Bloody Mary might appear in the mirror.

- You could be attacked by a woman and possessed by the black oil.

- There might be rats in the toilets.

- You may have to examine a deformed baby.

- Someone else might be in there assembling a gun.

- You might suffer nosebleeds.

- You might see weird ghosts in the mirror.

- You might be unable to get warm.

- You might be accosted by a big blonde woman who asks you intimate
  questions about your partner.

- A strange, water-based lifeform might try to kill you.

- Frohike might be hiding behind the door.

- If you're trying to make a secret tape recording, don't bother:
  government agents will retrieve it from the postbox as soon as
  you're gone.

- You may be attacked and inhabited by a bizarre Indian Mystic type
  thing, leading to your painful and bloody demise.

- You may shed your skin and turn into a supersoldier.